Daddy’s Honest Perspective Of Himself During Labor

2 years, 6 month.

Dear Jack,

Last night Mommy and I watched a total chick flick, What To Expect When You’re Expecting.

As far as the main takeaway for me, as a dad, the movie served as a visual reminder of what it’s like for the dad as the mom is giving birth.

In particular, I’m referring to the ridiculous and easily mockable theatrics that an empathetic and supportive father engages himself during labor:

“Hee-hee-hoo! Hee-hee-hoo! You’re doing great! I’m so proud of you! Hee-hee-hoo!”

Those words of encouragement are of course accompanied by the dad making constant, unflattering, John-Mayer-singing faces.

At least no one other than Mommy or the doctors saw my 12 hour goofball performance while Mommy was giving birth to you.

I know this has to sound petty, but when I think of Mommy and I having another baby (not necessarily any time soon, by the way) the first thing that enters my mind is, “Ah man, I have to be that dramatic character again.”

That’s one reason I wouldn’t mind Mommy getting the epidural right away if we have another baby.

Unlike the extremely pro-Business Of Being Born dad I was back in 2010, I’ve sort of went the other way on that one. I just want to be able to fast-forward through the whole labor process, as awkward and exhausting as it was for me, and I assume, Mommy.

While there’s this traditional concept of “there’s nothing like holding your own child for this first time,” it took months for me to feel that way. I’ve said multiple times that being a dad actually wasn’t something awesome for me until you were 15 months, because that’s the age you starting acknowledging my presence.

That was the age where I felt psychologically needed by you, not just physically.

That was the age where I stopped subconsciously thinking, “I have to do this,” and started thinking, “I want to do this.”

What I’m not sure of is whether it sounds selfish of me to say that out loud. Maybe I’m the only dad who feels this way, so I can’t speak for anyone other than myself.

If nothing else, the simple thought is this:

I feel awkward enough in life on a daily basis. I have a very unsuccessful high five record with other guys. I never know if there’s going to be a snap or a half-hug involved.

So the thought of going through the labor process again, not to mention, the first 15 months, again… well, I can handle it, but it is a little intimidating.

 

Love,

Daddy

 

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