Oh Wait… Are We Helicopter Parents? (Part 1)

22 months.

Recently at my son’s daycare, I was asked by a fellow parent, “I’ve noticed you carry Jack out everyday instead of walking him out like the rest of us. Why is that?

I didn’t know what to say.

Honestly, I had never thought about it before. I didn’t realize I was weird for not letting my son, who is now nearly half my height, to walk out to the car while holding my hand.

One answer that came to mind was that it’s too much trouble to get out of the building and into the car with him walking in the midst of distractions; that it’s just easier to carry him out. True…

But really, now that I’ve thought about it, I’d say the main reason I carry my nearly 2 year-old son into and out of day care each day is because it’s one of the rare times he actually likes me to be physically close to him; aside from wrestling him.

In other words, if you’re familiar with the book, The 5 Love Languages, my son’s is not physical touch.

However, he does this new thing now where as soon as I pick him up and start walking with him, he pats me on the back. It’s really sweet of him.

(I can’t believe I just said the word sweet. That’s so not my style.)

When I carry my son around, it’s like our designated “buddy time,” I guess.

But yes, it’s completely unnecessary, given that he’s been walking since I can’t remember.

So while it could just be that I enjoy our “man cuddle” time, yeah I know that sounds weird, it could be hinting at the fact that possibly, maybe, I might be a helicopter parent.

Let me unpack this theory, out loud.

When I think of the annoying phrase “helicopter parents,” it never has a positive connotation.

I think immediately of attachment parenting; something I never want to be associated with.

Why? Because I never want to be (or be seen as) an extremist, of any kind.

And when I think of helicopter parents, I think of extreme parents who are “a bit out there.”

With your feedback along with my self-analysis, I am going to try to figure out if my wife and I could possibly be considered helicopter parents.

You decide, after reading “Oh Wait… Are We Helicopter Parents? (Part 2).”

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  1. by Amanda

    On October 8, 2012 at 7:26 am

    I don’t know that you’re a helicopter parent (of course, I haven’t read part 2 yet) but I think it’s awesome that you sneak in “man cuddle” time. Would it make you feel better that my 20-yr-old stepson, who is a man’s man (wrestling and football in high school, MMA and muay thai now, has frequently been described as “cut” and “beast”) also uses the word “sweet” in reference to my 6-month-old son. My son gave my stepson a big hug before my stepson left for work one morning and my son patted his back. (he’s a big patter… always has been) My stepson broke into a huge grin and said, “Awww!!!! He’s so sweet!” I, meanwhile, turned into a big puddle of mush and thought that my son sure is lucky to have such an awesome big brother who’s not afraid to be all touchy-feely and emotional. So kudos to you for finding sneaky ways to have some physical touch moments with your adorable little boy!