Daddymoons, Manshowers, and Dadchelor Parties: Clever Or Lame?

22 months.

To answer my own question: Lame.

Part of my agenda as the daddy blogger for a major parenting website is to positively re-brand fatherhood; to reinforce the fact that a dad changing his kid’s diaper is not ironic at all and that taking care of his own kid without Mommy around is not babysitting… it’s a man taking care of his own kid.

That’s the world we live in and that’s the generation I’m a part of.

Needless to say, I am not cool with the cartoonish concept of a soon-to-be dad having a drunken party (or the likeness thereof) with his buddies to celebrate his final days of freedom before he inevitably says goodbye to his sex life and his ability to watch football games on his 56 inch TV without being interrupted by his crying infant or nagging wife, which therefore makes his life a 1980′s sitcom hell.

Just to be sure that I’m not exaggerating what Dadchelor Parties are all about, an article on The Huffington Post describes them as an event “where men bring diapers in exchange for beer, while others are more extravagant and involve all day bar-hopping or even a destination weekend. All seem to involve drinking, sporting events, gambling, and more drinking.”

Cute.

Okay, okay, but what about the non-drunken version of a Dadchelor Party?

What’s wrong with a soon-to-be dad hanging out with a couple of friends to share some beers and smoke some cigars in an effort to invite the days of fatherhood in a more sophisticated fashion?

Well, I guess I don’t have too big of a problem with that, except for the simple fact I don’t know anyone in my version of the real world who would think that’s cool; especially when attached with the phrase Dadchelor Party, Daddymoon, or Manshower.

I have a feeling that my own friends would actually think that having a “Manshower” is not only tacky, but also, uh…

Manshower? Come on, need I say more?

So what am I offering as a legitimate and respectable alternative? I say the kind of man who I would consider cool enough to be my friend would leave me out of the equation all together and instead take his wife on a babymoon.

The phrase “babymoon” is uber trendy, and therefore annoying, and is not a word I will ever speak aloud, but the concept of taking your pregnant wife on a getaway trip before the baby comes is righteous.

My wife and I went on [one of those] before our son was born an then we went on another one about 6 months after he was born.

It’s a good thing; especially for husbands and expecting fathers who, you know, are A) actually responsible adults B) who respect their wives and C) can understand that having a good time doesn’t need to require a hangover afterwards.

But for those soon-to-be dads who would rather flirt with 20 year-old waitresses at bars all weekend while getting “plastered,” and then brag about it the next week on Facebook, all in the name of a Dadchelor Party, you’ve lost your man card.

Let me know if you ever want it back.

 

Image: Let’s go party, via Shutterstock.

 

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  1. by Eric

    On September 27, 2012 at 11:03 am

    I’m gonna have to disagree with you brother. I dont see what’s wrong with having some buddies over to BBQ and watch some football in celebration of the new addition. Its a great reason to get up with some of your buddies that you might not have that much time for in the upcoming months. You make it seem like we are all in college and HAVE to get uber drunk in order to celebrate. Maybe that’s in your experience but it doesn’t have to be the way you explained it. Try again.

  2. by Nick Shell

    On September 27, 2012 at 9:48 pm

    Eric, I see what you are saying, and if it’s done the way you are describing it, then fine. But the connotation that is currently attached to “Dadchelor Parties” includes the drunken association. Therefore, it’s something I want to distance myself from. If you come up with a new name for it that doesn’t include drunkenness and isn’t corny, let me know. I might even consider writing a follow-up.

  3. by Amanda

    On October 10, 2012 at 8:03 am

    I love you! That is all. I think you and my husband would get along great!

    (Disclaimer: The “I love you” is said in a way that would, in no way, make your wife jealous. It just means that there needs to be more men like you in the world.)