5 Reasons This Dad Despises Two and a Half Men

One year.

This is one time I’ll openly admit in the opening line that my opinion in this blog post is completely wrong and off-base, as evidenced by the general American population. The sitcom Two and a Half Men has ranked among the Top 20 programs each year since its premiere in 2003. In a New York Times article back in February of this year, it was tagged as “the biggest hit comedy of the past decade.”

So now I shall commit to the heresy of condemning America’s favorite sitcom. Here are the top 5 reasons I despise Two and a Half Men:

1) It serves as the epitome of idiotic stereotypes for men. Alan is a pathetic dork with no game. His son Jake is an uninspired underachiever. And of course Charlie is a sleazy womanizer. These aren’t men.

The show should be called Two and Half Men You Wouldn’t Actually Want to Associate with in Real Life. Or even better, 101 Ways to Be an A-Hole.

2) It objectifies women as either A) sexy and stupid or B) shrewd and non-sexual. At least the show negatively stereotypes both men and women. Therefore, since it is equally sexist for both genders, I guess that means that technically it’s not sexist at all: All the sexism just cancels itself out.

3) I don’t think it’s funny. How many times can I laugh about Charlie being a man whore, Alan not “getting lucky” despite his best efforts, or Jake passing gas when he is asked a question?

Calculating… I’ve been able to stomach about 5 episodes of the show throughout my lifetime. There are approximately 12 “jokes” per minute and each episode is about 23 minutes long. So after doing the math, I guess the answer is… about three times. One laugh for each time the show’s only three jokes were introduced to me, for the first time.

4) The success of the show has only encouraged Charlie Sheen’s real life bad behavior. Again, in real life if you knew a guy like Charlie (both the character and the actual person) you wouldn’t be laughing- you’d be disgusted or at least annoyed.

Well, he is a real person, and despite the fact his character has been killed off the show, the real Charlie is alive and well; and very, very rich. In 2010, he was earning nearly two million dollars an episode. Money well spent?

5) It carries no redeeming value. Scrubs was one of my favorite sitcoms of the past decade. Its main characters, men and women, often were silly and outrageous. Yet at the end of each episode, Zach Braff’s character summed up the life lesson to be learned with “Sometimes in life you have to be able to…”.

There is nothing to be learned in Two and Half Men. It’s an insult to my intelligence and to the very concept of what comedy is supposed to be.

Yes, I am a very old, bitter man who isn’t even cool enough to have Internet on my phone. What is all this talk about Angry Birds?

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  1. by Deb

    On November 25, 2011 at 4:50 pm


  2. by Melinda Gordon

    On November 25, 2011 at 8:43 pm

    So true! Thanks for writing this! I could not agree more!

  3. by lynn

    On April 19, 2013 at 7:13 pm

    Why aren’t more MEN agreeing?

    One problem I have with this show is how it affects men in real life.

    When I lived in Europe, men engaged me intelligently and thoughtfully and with respect as a woman.

    Upon returning to the United States, relationships have boiled down to sex selection. Men seem to objectify women to an extreme degree, reducing us to little more than sex objects, ensuring we are not respected on the job or as people and that women do not respect themselves.

    Just as tired as I am with having to contend with men who think that Howard Stern and Charlie Sheen are role models are the women who seem to think that the women who parade themselves on these shows are heroines. I can’t go anywhere these days without having women offer sex to my boyfriend or expose their cleavage and breasts as some form of fashion statement.

    Shows like this undermine the family, commodify both men and women, and cheapen relationships between men and women. They also make both genders dissatisfied with their partners, more likely to cheat and emphasize sex and materialism over spiritual values.

    The ideal woman then becomes not a decent, good woman with a good head on her shoulders but a brazen tart who is a sociopath who has perfected her image as a fetching, enticing sex kitten. The men use and discard women, and the women allow themselves to be used.

    Having said this, I have not owned or watched television for years. Recently I began watching again … and every show seems to revolve around sex except for the tabloid news channels and a few thoughtful shows like Criminal Minds.

    Otherwise Big Bang Theory — a breast flashing bimbo tying to make it with nerds, who have all the brains, and skills. The nerds only want to get laid. “Big Bang” is another allusion to sex.

    How I Met Your Mother — A show about sexual angst.

    Friends–roommates who trade partners and jump in and out of bed.

    Pretty much every show on TV revolves around sex.

    No wonder our culture is so sex obsessed, women are constantly exposing themselves and thinking sex is all they have to offer and men are onl out for one thing. Seriously, turn off the TV, read a good book, go out with your friends and family.

    TV is a vast wasteland.

    Two and a Half Men is a disgrace and makes me feel ashamed and embarrassed to be a woman. It also makes me feel cynical about men — that they are just shallow bed hopping bastards who can’t truly love and appreciate woman and whose life revolves around their next orgasm and conquest with no sense of standard or sanctity of families – pursuing sex with twins, with mother and daughter, with female friends and their friends. No one is off limits for male use, and of course the women are all up for it.