Foster Kids Abused Before Arriving at Your Home

If you’ve tuned in lately, you know that my family is enrolled to take a 24-hour foster care training course via the Los Angeles Country family and foster care services here in Calif. You may recall that the first time we enrolled, we had to back out because six weeks of 4-hour courses were held on Saturdays which makes it hard to finish since we have our Bio son Sam. For us to be educated, both my husband and I have to enroll together so what do we do with son Sam for six weeks of weekends?

The second time we enrolled for foster care training to foster-to-adopt a toddler or young child from the LA foster care system, there is no excuse. I bailed. I stopped planning on going. Not son Sam, or husband Darrin or anyone but me. I got a great contract job and had to travel for a few months, so I got out of it again.

Causing some friction in the marriage that I am waffling pout of taking this classes. Too busy, so terrifying, what if we get a freaky kid that harms our bio son? What if we get this emotionally scarred kid and cannot give her back? What f she ruins our life? You have to be so brave to take an older kid from foster care, but there are so many older children that need our help.

For advice I looked into the Federal government programs for foster care kids to find out real stats on how many children have been abused, sexually abused, etc. The stats are it will likely happen to kids older than 11:

“In some cases, you will not be certain that abuse has occurred, but you may suspect it. You may even be exploring becoming a foster or adoptive parent to a child in the foster care system; many of these children have been abused or neglected—physically, emotionally, or sexually—before coming into care. You may feel confused, frightened, and unsure of the impact the sexual abuse of a child may have on your child and family. It is important for you to understand that the term ‘sexual abuse’ describes a wide range of experiences.

Many factors—including the severity of abuse as well as others discussed later in this fact sheet—affect how children react to sexual abuse and how they recover. Most children who have been abused do not go on to abuse others, and many go on to live happy, healthy, successful lives. As parents, you will play an important role in your child’s recovery from childhood abuse.”

Would you ever adopt an older kid that comes from an abused background? I am having a really tough time.

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Back To The Adoption Diaries, by Nicole Dorsey-Straff
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  2. by Alice in WV

    On September 11, 2012 at 6:47 am

    Would I adopt an older child from foster care? Not only would I, I did, four years ago. And I didn’t have a husband to help me. I’m a single parent. Sure, it’s a challenge, but it can be done, and my daughter is a successful sixth grader, gets good grades, plays sports, has friends, and has blended into the family perfectly. Yes, she still has problems. Few of them are visible to the general public. She’ll probably struggle with some of them for the rest of her life, but I’ve done the best I can for her, and nobody’s life is perfect, even if you aren’t adopted. You’re welcome to contact me directly if you’d like to discuss older child adoption in depth. I’d be happy to tell you whatever you want to know. abengel (at) zoominternet (dot) net.