Happy July 4th to Adopted Families USA

As I watch children form a friendly circle around our local fireworks, I imagine all the kids that don’t have a neighborhood, or a happy home in which to celebrate today.

I think of these kids in foster care all the time now, and know how lucky I was growing up. Realize how lucky how my own biological son Sam is every single day.

Families in local foster care situations are trained for both foster care and adoption, and potential adoptive parents work closely with agency staff during the process. An adoption social worker is assigned to each parent; the social worker conducts home studies and offers emotional support and assistance through the process.

If we go the foster care route but then fall madly in love with the kid and have to return her to the family that once neglected her? Hmmm, fat chance I say. Then again, if she’s a real terror, has behavioral problems I can’t handle, or if she in any way upsets or harms my biological child, Sam, then what happens?

Can I give my foster care toddler back to the foster-to-adopt agency? Is that horrible to admit? There’s a lot going on in the news lately about returned children and foster care.


Happy July 4th to kids everywhere, and be careful with those firecrackers already. Tell me your adoption story in Comments below, and I may feature you in an upcoming post.



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Back To The Adoption Diaries, by Nicole Dorsey-Straff
  1. by Tricia

    On September 6, 2011 at 10:05 am

    You really need to look into the foster care system. In my opinion, foster care is over-used. Too many children are taken from parents who need a little help and sometimes, those children are lost forever to their parents. Foster care should be the last resort, but too often, it’s the first. I’ve done my own research on this and my opinion is based on that research. I am suggesting you do your own. Sometimes, foster care is a Godsend for a child, but often enough, it’s a new version of hell. And, other times, it just isn’t necessary.

    I don’t think you should attempt to become a foster parent because you want to adopt. If you become a foster parent, you need to understand you are an advocate for whatever child comes into your home. Your mind needs to be open to the fact that children are removed from homes without due process of law, and children are sometimes removed from loving, but dirty, homes, or homes where they have to spend an hour alone every day, or something that can be fixed in the CHILD’s home, not YOURS. If getting that child back to her parents is the best thing for her, you need to be willing to fight for that. If you don’t have that in you, please don’t sign up to be a foster parent. If all you want is to adopt, PLEASE PLEASE do not sign up to be a foster parent.

    Obviously, if you were to foster a child that you couldn’t handle, you also need to understand it’s not in your or her best interest to keep her in your home, and you have to advocate to get her to a safe and more appropriate place. I don’t think this is really an issue. I think the bigger issue is thinking the child protective services in this country always gets it right when then remove a child from their parents. They don’t. You have to be open to that idea.

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