Ready to Adopt Quiz: Is the Timing Right?
One thing everyone agrees on — whether you’ve been adopted yourself, plan to adopt in the near future, or even if you have very firm beliefs about the process itself. Here’s the truth: Adoption is an emotional roller coaster that both beings out the best in your family (social responsibility, loyalty and the ability to love) and challenges any family to come together in new ways.
Take this great readiness quiz on Parents.com to see if emotionally, you are prepared to proceed on this roller-coaster journey of adoption. The second question has tripped up our family for six months because I simply have not been ready to move forward in the international adoption process, and several strikes against us have cropped up.
This is the question that stalled us for several months:
True or false: My partner is not as open to adopting a child as I am.
True, True and True
Also, we considered our finances carefully, and though we’ve wanted to adopt internationally for a couple years now, we haven’t had the capital, and an international adoption can cost upwards of $30,000. For starter, yup, that’s right.
Adoption readiness also hinges on whether or not you know other adoptive families who have experienced happy outcomes. This support system — primed and ready — really helps prepare your family to welcome a new addition. And helps you wait it out, which may be the longest part of the journey. We are just starting to meet other potential families at adoption seminars and while they’re always emotional, Darrin and Sam and I feel untouched somehow. We don’t care about other peoples stories that much — we want to hear more about the pitfalls so we don’t do them as well.
I spoke briefly last week to a social worker at an agency we no longer want to work with but every piece of narrowing down helps the adoption cause. But answer this: Why don’t my eyes fill with congratulatory tears every time I meet a family who’s recently adopted? Should I not feel a sense of urgency or relief that adoption still happens with regularity? “Not again,” I think to myself and try to edge out the door. Am I just envious?
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