Foster to Adopt Parenting Training

adoption diaries eating fruitLike many, many of you, my husband Darrin and I have veered from yearning to adopt an African or Asian orphan via international adoption channels to shifting gears and wanting to move forward with a domestic adoption that seems more like a sure thing. (Nothing about adoption seems like a sure thing, however.)

I talked to several parents who have been waiting for a Chinese newborn daughter for three long years.  I have an editor-friend in NYC who waited nearly four years for her newborn Chinese daughter! Too long.

Talked to a couple who has been waiting for a domestic adoption with a newborn for almost three years… The first two birth mothers backed out of the planned adoption.

And then you hear from a mother or parent who is finally counting the days until she holds her baby and that single conversation (for me) makes all the difference in this volatile, seemingly endless adoption journey. Every family must feed on hope as they wait, I think that’s the lesson for me to learn. The journey and what it does to your family is part of the outcome of a successful adoption; this rollercoaster ride has to make your family stronger along the way.

Here are a few inspiring words from an adoptive mother in Florida, a friend I will call *Denise.

Denise is very involved with the yoga community on the East Coast and she is single and in her mid-forties. She’s been working with an international agency who specializes in Indian adoptions because Denise feels  involved with the culture, the food, the history. She owns her own business and plunked down just over $15,000 to start the agency process nearly three years ago now.

Several months ago, she was sent a beautiful photo of a 2-year-old toddler and became incredibly excited to meet her and push forward with the Indian adoption. But then an Indian family (who has preference in India) decided to adopt the little girl and Denise was back to waiting for another daughter.

Months went by. Yesterday we spoke once again, and Denise was literally packing up to fly to India for 10 days or so to legally finalize her adoption of  3-year-old girl Jaya.

This is what Denise says about finally meeting her new daughter in less than 48 hours. “I can’t believe this moment has arrived. I’ve now waited years to meet my daughter. The agency has shown her pictures of our house, of what her pink room looks  like, she sees photos of me and tries to say ‘Mommy’ but she does not speak a word of English!”

Mother and daughter have never met and Denise says with a semi-hysterical laugh, “I am terrified!” She promises to send photos and call to report when they return to Florida.

I cannot imagine the wild sense of anticipation! …. Comment here if you have a great story for Parents.com!

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Back To The Adoption Diaries, by Nicole Dorsey-Straff
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