Parenting Twins: A Dad's Perspective

Bed, Birth & Beyond

Rest Is Best

Many times, I felt that my most important contribution was reminding my wife that she was pregnant with twins. I would tell her this hoping she would go to bed and get the rest she needed. I would tell her this so she would remember why her shoes would no longer fit. I would tell her this so she would stop feeling guilty about all the things she wasn't doing around the house and hopefully ... go to bed and get the rest she needed.

Labor

All birthing stories are amazing, unique, and indescribable, yet they all share one thing in common: You have absolutely no control. No matter what happens during the course of your twins' arrival, rest assured that you will be taking the most thrilling roller-coaster ride of your life!

Mommy Cares for Babies, Daddy Cares for Mommy

Not to scare the husbands and annoy the women but fellas, you are screwed! The Twin Mommy you now share your home with feels as if the weight of the world is on her shoulders and nothing she can do is good enough. Her hormones are raging and she's exhausted. The best you can do is to be a gentle coach and remind her of the big picture, get some food down her throat, and just be there to help, or to listen or to agree or just to hug.

Prepare & Repair

In the early days when you are living your life in three-hour feeding cycles, always prepare for the next cycle! In other words, if you've just used the last diaper on the changing table, restock it. If you've just jammed the last diaper into the Genie, empty the Genie. If you've just used the last clean bottle, clean up a new pair so they are ready for the next round, because you never know if the next round may involve a cranky Mom and two colicky babies with absolutely no patience for an overflowing Genie and no clean bottles!

Mistakes -- Made & Forgotten

Sure, you'll bang their heads carrying them through doorways, you'll feed them food that will give them a rash, you'll knock them over and step on their toes, you may even drop them, but you will be the only one who remembers. The biggest mistake you can make is to project adult reactions onto your kids and treat mistakes like traumas. A hug, a kiss, and an "I'm sorry" should cover most situations. It should work for Mommy and Daddy too.

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