Teach Your Baby to Sleep (In Just 7 Days)

I heard/saw Dr. Sears in an interview back peddle and admit that maybe CIO isnt really as damaging as he once said. I was horrified by the idea of CIO especially when a doctor says it can effect their brain chemically. Then I started thinking logically. And of course saw him say he was WRONG and meant it for a very specific circumstance. I'm a grown up, I love my kids and I'm sick with sleep deprivation. Quit judging and be graceful.

This is an excellent article! I appreciate the accuracy of the information as well as the author's answers to frequently asked questions re: sleep training. It really is easier on the baby the earlier sleep training begins. Parents think they are doing their baby a favor by waiting, but that is really doing a disservice to your child's development, which primarily occurs through healthy, uninterrupted stretches of good quality (i.e., not carrying, bouncing, walking, sleeping on parent) sleep.

my babys 6 mo.this DOESNT WORK.it hurts my heart 2 much to let her cry.half the time i go in her room and shes tangled in the crib slats and in a cold sweat.she sleeps on my chest still.i hold her and rock for her nap.i cant say i hate it.my friend once said,in early days of man babies were hardwired to cry if left alone w/fear they might be eaten by wild animals.they cry for protection.sorry if im considered a bad parent for not approving CIO.my baby needs me.and i need her.

I am so confused...not sure what the right thing to do....it is really hard to hear your baby cry, well more like a screaming fit.

Letting baby CIO is not abusive as long as they are older than 3 months according to a pedi at sick kids hospital. you're just giving them the tools they need to learn to sooth themselves. To learn to sooth themselves they have to be givin the opportunity. if your child cried everytime you fed them fruit or veggies would you say that was okay as long didn't cry?

For those perents who don't know the difference in your baby's cries...There is a difference in a hungry or hurt cry and I just want to be picked up cry. This article is not telling you to ignore their needs. I am a mother of 5 kids. 2 sets of twins, 4 year. Those who believe this article is cruel or harmful, as a family phycologist my belief is that the parent has attachment issues and this will only lead to bigger problems down the line!

I am looking for a no cry sleep solution...I guess I need to get Dr.Sear's book. I'd rather be sleep deprieved than ignore their cries. Has anyone had any luck with a NO CRY sleep through the night solution? Also, I have twins and doing it alone...so one of me and two of them. They share a room which complicates our sleep issues a bit.

From day1, I coslept w/my bbygirl. She sleeps great as long as I¿m holding her. Now, she is 3months & needs to sleep on her own. So, we started a routine after reading this article & the book "Healthy sleep habits, healthy child". Our routine: 6pm bath. 6:20pm feed, burp & rock to sleep. 7pm down into crib. The 1st night was hard, she cried for 1-2 hours & console her every 5mins. The 2nd night, she only cried for 45mins & consolation every 10mins. The 3rd night, she only cried for 5mins!

Diff drs say diff things when it comes to CIO. What I gather from all the diff opinions, CIO is perfectly fine after u have established a trust w/your infant. At some point, u need to draw the line or else u will be THAT parent w/ the screaming, spoiled kid in the store or restaurant!

I don't force my baby to sleep, making him cry till he vomits. This is CRUEL and ABUSIVE!!! As I don't force him to take a bottle (he refused to take bottle or peci from day one) by starving him as other books and ¿doctors¿ say. It is His personality. Why break it? It is time and place for everything. There will be his time for first steps, words and full nights of sleep. Trusting relationship with my baby worth every sleepless night.

Grandiose statements after reading one book? Although his research may say that this is "damaging", it certainly does not apply to all babies. One of the most major causes of depression in new mothers is sleep deprivation. This is not safe, or necessary for any woman to go through. This method is not neglectful. You may like having a 3 year old who still wakes up at night but many of us need sleep and so do our children. No psychological problems here!

This is a horrible article! PARENTS, I can't believe you even published this, I am dissapointed like so many parents below. This is so heartless to let CIO. Please read Dr. Sears' "Baby Book", best book ever and about how damaging this method is for babies. Babies need love and comfort and they will trust you if you will respond to their cues. A crying baby will not thrive because he will waste his energy on crying. I expect from the publisher of this magazine to better screen their articles.

Sometimes our daughter wakes up at 3 am crying because she's had a bad dream. We go in to comfort her, singing a sleepy time song, and stroke her back. How cruel would it be to just let her wail? Not only is her needs not being met, but a faulty assumption is being made as to what her need actually is. Learn your baby and be willing to sacrifice a some sleep. When your infant is comfortable and has their needs met, they will sleep.

Some children just need to eat before you're ready to get up, accept it. Don't we as adults get hungry at weird times of the day? Infants are no different! So follow your instincts and common sense and meet their nighttime needs. Additionally, pacifiers are a way children learn to self soothe, so provide one! Place an extra one in the crib in case they lose touch with the one they originally had or it falls out of the crib.

While there are some good tips mentioned (keep lights off, put them to bed still awake, let them fuss a little, step in and offer reassurance), there are some disturbing ones too. Every child is a different being, and by not answering their "call" you're teaching them early on their needs will not be met, destroying trust and security. Don't buy into the analysis that if you're meeting other needs, you can ignore the nighttime call and it won't do them damage. That analysis is fallacious.

Haha. This article makes me laugh. This may work for a good sleeper, but for a child like mine this system is worthless. I tried all of these tips, read countless sleep books - both non-CIO and CIO (once we got desperate). None of them worked. CIO meant she screamed her head off for 3 hours or more - even with us in the room! After 3 nights with her crying for longer periods every night, we gave that up. She finally started sleeping through the night at 16 months - when SHE was ready to do it.

Although you may disagree this article does not say ABANDON your child. It says to check on them so they know you are there. There comes a time when babies need to learn to go to sleep on their own, and they are crying because they know if I cry-I get held. It's called positive reinforcement-Action=Results. This method teaches them that the Action of putting them into bed=the result of time to go to sleep. I don't think it is selfish it's teaching a good habit.

... I love this article. I husband and i are currently in this process with our 9 month old twins. The only question i have is what about nap time?? do i do the same thing lay them down on there own or should i rock them to sleep like i would any other day. I feel like im going to confuse them even more if i help them to sleep during the day but not at night time.

CIO is HORRIBLE! It teaches a child that the person they trust most is abandoning them and is not going to come when the child needs him/her. We prefer to teach our children that we can be called on at ALL hours... day OR night. We respond lovingly to ALL our children's cries no matter their need. Touch and comfort ARE legitimate needs... it is sad that so many think that at a certain age, babies/children should no longer need those things...

Everyone has different parenting styles. My mother let me CIO, and believe me, I am well adjusted, I can trust people, and I am not socially awkward! Amazing! My son naturally STTN at 7 weeks with his doctor's blessing, so I was lucky. But don't judge others just because you don't have the same parenting styles. What works for one baby will not for the next.

Cont'd from my previous post: Follow your untainted intuition about meeting your baby's needs. I know it is difficult to keep these "expert" opinions out of your mind, esp if these opinions come from people close to you. But remember that only you really know what your child needs because you grew her in your belly. The reason why you have a strong urge to pick your baby up when he cries is because you are wired to do so. If babies didn't cry, they probably wouldn't have lived.

This is horrible advice. Don't give in to the doctor's "expertise," which is what I did at the beginning of my son's life. This may work, but it doesn't mean that this is the right thing to do. Babies cannot talk therefore they cry. This means that they are trying to communicate that something is wrong. They are hungry, something hurts, they are scared, lonely, in need of ... you. Remember that they were inside of you for 9 months. They don't even know that they are separate person yet.

This is the best thing I ever could have done for my daughter. I was apprehensive because I worried about lasting effects. However, every night since night three she does not cry when I lay her down and she sleeps through the night. Not only that but she seems so much happier during the day because she gets QUALITY sleep. I highly recommend this, but I think whatever you think is right for your child is right and you shouldn¿t let others tell you otherwise!

It is not like they are TELLING you that you HAVE to do this. To each there own and if you don't agree they you don't. Everyone is different and you shouldn't judge others. It is one thing if they are actually abusing there child or something but there are SO many different studies, articles, reccommendations that you really just have to go with what you are comfortable with.

I have a 11 month old he does not sleep all night he wakes up about 2 to 3 times a night. He sleeps in my room in his crib but, I can't let him cry because my husband has to work so I have to get up every time. I have kept him up or try to shorten his naps hoping he will sleep at night doesn't work. My older kid's never slept all night either til they were about 4yrs old I really would like a full night of sleep.

"Your baby will remember a little sooner that crying doesn't produce results." That makes my heart hurt. A baby cries because crying is its only means of communication. I certainly wouldn't want my mother / husband / friend / caregiver ignoring me when I was trying to tell them I need something. =(

i'm constantly astounded by the way parents react to different methods. my son is 7 weeks and completely well adjusted. he is capable of sleeping on his own and entertaining himself during the day when there are things that have to be done such as laundry and dinner. He is well-loved and knows that his dad and i are there for him. he also knows that bedtime is bedtime. stop accusing any mother of loving their child less than you do. try a little respect.

Different strokes for different folks. There is no right and wrong way. Who do you think you are? My kids are worth the late nights. If they are happy I am happy. I don't care what you say about my parenting style.

My toddler is two and she still has a pacifier and she is extrememly smart. She has been talking since she was 8 months old. I know my 5 month old is smart as well I can just tell. I will never do the self soothe practice. I've seen it done and it is just cruel. It was so hard to not go in and pick up that screaming baby and it wasn't even mine.

this article is ridiculous. I'm giving my baby a pacifier. i'm not going to just let her scream and cry. A pacifier and a bottle is a crutch. What kind of parents did you have? You act like these are grown ups. they are babies and babies cry. I hope my mom didn't let me scream in a crib and not pick me up. My baby is five months old and I would do anything to keep her from being in pain or feeling scared. If she needs to be held she will be held and it is not spoiling a baby.

Wow, this article is a crock of bad science. And it's old! Take it down and stop recycling it.

I cant believe that you would recommend a 3 MONTH old should sleep through the night. Breastfeeding babies need to be fed AT LEAST once at night if not twice for both the child and your own milk production. This article is obviously against breast feeding and to me sounds like putting your needs before your child's. All of my children slept through the night naturally eventually without 'ignoring' my child. Shame on you for publishing this Parents!

i need help like yesterday

my one year old sleep well during the nights but i am having a problem with day time naps what an i do?

my son is 1 yr old and he still will not sleep at a normal time. He will get sleepy around 8pm and goes to sleep he wakes up a few hrs later and will be up til 2-3am. I have tried letting him cry it out, but it didnt work and seemed cruel. Now he just will not stay up if I wake him before he is ready. I dont want to deny him sleep. Is anyone else experiencing this? HELP! lol

This is harmful for your baby. There are a number of studies recording this (http://tiny.cc/1avkq full references at the end), they will feel insecure, be less sociable, have difficulty in trusting others... Babies need to be feed during the night (yes, I know it's hard, I am a mother 15 month old boy-sleeping through the night since 10 months old), they need cuddling, affection and love. Over time they build their own independence, knowing that mum and dad will always be there if they need it.

Ok, I need help. My little boy is 18 months old, refuses to sleep in his bed. He seems to be very restless. He wakes up about 2 to 3 times a night, he is on a sippy cup, no more bottles. He doesn't even want me or a drink. We have tried the crying out sine early weeks, but at the 45 minute mark he throws up repetedly. Plus we have a 4 year old so all the cryung wakes him up too, then we have two cryin kids! Mentally stresses, physically stresses. desperate!

my baby is 8 months old and stil doesnt sleep thru the night so what i do is let him have 1 sleep in the day at 11am then get him up at 1pm and he will sleep thru... the only reason i let my son cry himself to sleep is if he doesnt settle when i rock him. so i put him down and do a house chore or something, then get him up and try again in about 5-10 mins... there's no harm in it. its the best exercise they can get so they are worn out enough to be able to sleep of a nite time

some pearents let their baby just cry it out but for how long do they have to cry before they get tierd of crying?? It breaks my heart to hear my baby cry for some thing that i can prevent. Do you have the heart to keep your baby crying when she only wants you to comfort her when she sad?? Babies are babies and they didnt ask to be born, so stop making up excusses for not picking her up and start beaing a pearent in letting her know that she can turst you for what she needs!!! YOU, her pearent!

My daughter is 10mo old. she sleeps in her crib in our room. She wakes up every 2-4 hours and wants to be breastfed back to sleep. usually takes about 5-10min. for her to go back to sleep. We tried letting her cry before but we couldn't let it go on for more than 10min. We just feel too bad. I know I might regret it in the long run but it works for now.

this article is very disturbing. there is indeed some evidence that intense crying is harmful for very young infants. and it sounds so abusive implying that their crying is harder on the parent. babies are people. they cry for a reason - whatever that reason is. when adults cry or express a strong emotion we take that seriously. if you wouldn't treat you partner this way treat your child this way? i am so troubled by this "sleep training."

As a first time mother of a 7 week old, I find this article very disturbing. Infants at thisage are not manipulative - they cry because of basic needs (hungry, wet, love).My son feeds every 3-4 ounces, 3-4 hours around the clock. And at 13 pounds, I DO NOT think he is being overfed and thus wetting his diapers too often like this article suggests. I would encourage new parents to keep your eyes and ears open for information that works for you, regardless of any "expert's" advice.

Complete bs. I would never let my precious daughter think I am not here for her. In my opinion its pur selfish laziness. You can sacrifice 5 months out of your 80 years o taking care of your child. If not then thats not saying much about your future parenting. Being a parent means sacrificing. We are all they have. If they were meant to sleep through thenight so young God would have created them to do just that. Can you imagine what it must feel like to be so scared and then to be ignored? awful

i dont get it. i have a 1 1/2 month old and this article says im supposted to just "check on him" when he starts crying in the middle of the night and "not to offer him a bottle or pacifier"?? i dont get it. serious. how am i supposted to keep my milk supply up. how is my baby supposed to thrive? wheres the trust? he crys for food (b/c i know his cry) and i go and feed him. and this article is suggesting i all of a sudden break the bond of trust we have w/each other at night?! crazy...

I waited until my son was 6 months to CIO. I fought doing it but it worked. Our pediatrician said he was at more than good enough weight & he would make up any missed calories during the day. I made sure he was fully fed, dry & warm. The first night he cried for 40 min (at 2x during the night), next night was only 20 min & the following night he slept 10 hours. He was old enough so I knew he was waking up out of habit. He is better rested now. It was harder on me (I cried) then it was on him.

My son is 6wks old and does well sleeping 4-6 hrs a night. The problem we are having is that he will not sleep in his bed/bassinet. He will sleep on my chest all night leaving me to sleep on the couch or in the recliner. Every time I put him down in his bassinet, he cries - I have tried laying him on his boppy in the bassinet and on his inclined positioner - nothing seems to work. Any advice on how I get him to sleep in his bed and not on me? (I'm not for the CIO method --- anything else?)

Babies should never learn that "crying doesn't produce results." It's their only form of communication - when a baby cries, it is because he/she NEEDS something, whether that's food, a clean diaper, or just comfort - those are all LEGITIMATE needs that should not be ignored. What people don't realize is that when babies stop crying while going to sleep alone, it isn't because they've learned to comfort themselves, it's because they've given up on you (the parents) caring for his/her needs. :o(

I agree whole-heartedly with what cazntone said. Babies are not meant to sleep through the nigh until it naturally happens. A baby doesn't know that you are in the next room - for all he knows he's completely by himself unless he can hear, feel, &/or see the only comfort he knows - PARENTS. Plus, there have been studies that show a baby crying for too long can cause STROKE-LIKE conditions in a baby's brain. How awful to put a baby thru that, whether it causes damage or not.

i must be lucky then, my son is almost 3 months and is sleeping through the night. but then again he is an average sized baby. maybe this article is towards typical average babies @ the mom with the preemie and the skinny baby - your baby obviously needs special attention so this may not work for you. but this may work for women who's babies don't have complications and are gaining proper weight. think before you down someone's advice, it's not for everyone.

People that are against cry it out have not been at their wits end I think...I haven't slept more than 2 hours at a time in a year and yeah I'm considering it now, sucks but tired mom is not that fun.

Shame on you for publishing this! Teaching new parents that a 3 month old baby should be sleeping through the night! Some 3 month olds still need to eat, especially breast fed babies. Many of my sons doctors do not advocate cio - ESPECIALLY UNDER 6 MONTHS OLD. My baby was a preemie - I saw first hand on the monitors what crying did and the stress it put on his body - his heartrate soared as did his rr. That amount of stress on a 3 month old baby! Insanity.

ridiculous advice. Period.

Crying it out is such an outdated practice it drives me nuts that this is still advocated by many doctors. It tells your child that if you cry during the day I will be there but at night I am leaving you to your own devices. Poor little darling. Elizabeth Pantley, author of No-Cry Sleep Solution, offers some of the best advice out there. It is so worth doing everything you can to not let your child cry.

My 7 months old baby used to sleep through the night until her 5th month. The doctor said no matter how this might be tiring for us we should feed her on demand because she is rather thin. I try to give her a bigger quantity at the 10PM bottle, thinking she might sleep through the night again, but she only takes her usual quantity. Besides, putting her to bed at night has become a real battle. The hairdryer used to soothe her quickly but is losing its efficiency. can anyone help me on that?

My baby is 9 months and she sleeps in her crib in our bedroom. She wakes up many times at night and stands in her crib and keeps on crying until we don't pick her up & rock her back to sleep. We desparately want to change this, but are very much reluctant in trying cry it out method. We tried it once & she puked. Are there any other options???

I do not like "sleep methods". Understanding your baby's "sleep pattern" is much better. My baby is 3 months old, weighs 15 pounds and has a regular night time "sleep pattern". He feeds at 7pm, 10pm then feeds (but doesn't fully wake-up) around 2 or 3am and again around 6 or 7am. Since we co-sleep and I breast feed this is our routine. I consider him a good "sleeper" and we are both well rested. A good baby book is by Dr. Sears. May God bless you and keep you!

I think this article has bad advice! Letting your baby "cry it out" is not good. Babies need to feel secure and know that their needs are going to be met. I work with first time parents and we do not start the sleeping process until about 6 months. You do what you feel is best but I do not suggest letting a baby under 6 months cry it out. Not healthy for mom or baby!

I thought this was a great article and I agree with every bit of it. This is exactly how I got my first child to sleep through the night and he is still an amazing sleeper (and never ended up in my bed). I want this for my daughter too. However, every family is different. I think every woman and family should do what it appropriate and easy for them. Just remember, you must live with what you create.

To farrabug525 - I don't agree with the article that you may be overfeeding him. But I like the advice of keeping the nighttime feeding as short and quiet as possible. If he is falling asleep while eating, gently removing the bottle and putting him back to sleep can help. For my baby to stay awake, I remove blankets from her, stroke her cheek, talk to her and change her diaper in the middle of feeding. At some point I used a wipe to stroke her in cheek and neck so the cool would wake her up.

My baby is three months today & Im confused. I felt like he was doing great until I started reading about sleep time. He will usually go to sleep around 830 or 9 & sleep for 4-6 hours & he wakes up to eat, but he will eat & get a diaper change & go right back to sleep until around 7. He weighs almost 15 lbs, so does that mean Im over feeding him? Also, how do I get him to stay awake through the feeding so he doesnt eventually use a bottle as a crutch? Does anybody have any advice?

There is some good advice in this article, but I'm not a huge fan of crying it out. I hope parents remember every child and every family is different. My son, from birth, was a violent screamer and adamant about being held and soothed. He didn't sleep through the night until he was 10 months old. I often wondered if I was doing the right thing but he's my son is now 15 months and doing fantastic. Do what feels right for you -- they all eventually sleep through the night.

my baby is almost 12 wks. he goes to sleep between 10 and 10:30pm, wakes up between 2 and 3am, feeds a little about an ounce or two max and then falls back for another 3 to 4 hrs. i think he is doing a great job, or should i start with the sleeping process?

I am a mom of 5 sons-6 weeks is WAY to young to let them "cry it out"! Please soothe your baby when he wakes up mid-nap. Now, I'm not saying PICK UP your baby-sometimes a pacifier and a couple of whispered words are enough to relax your baby back into sleep...they just want to know that your there. Hold his face in your hands, or tickle his head or pat his bottom. Enough to let him know it's still "sleepy time". Just relax and enjoy your baby!

to Iswmulhearn...this article contains GUIDELINES for new parents...not rigid rules. It is ok to let your baby cry for a few minutes...obviously not hours. allowing them to start the self soothing process is not damaging their development, nor is it an indicator that the parent loves their child any less. use your own discretion, if your baby is obviously in distress, tend to them...but you are NOT a bad parent and they are not going to be loved any less if you let them soothe themselves.

My baby is 9 weeks old and she also needs to be held to go to sleep. After I put her down she wakes up for 2 or 3 times until finally she stays asleep. Sometimes I hold her and pat her back or I rock her,

YES! He is way too young to cry it out. I do not believe crying it out is ever appropriate, however, if you still choose to do so, please wait until he is at least 6 months old. This article has bad information. It is ok to rock them to sleep or nurse them to sleep or sing them to sleep or however they prefer. You are not damaging him or spoiling him. He is only 6 weeks old, please just love on him and enjoy this time.

How early is too early to let a baby cry to sleep. My 6 week old needs to be held to go to sleep. If he wakes up mid-nap he cries to be held or for a pacifier. Is he too young to learn by crying it out?