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What should I do when my toddler has a tantrum?

My toddler throws a tantrum if she doesn't like the clothes I've picked out for her. What should I do?
Submitted by Parents Team

Give her a choice. Tantrums are a way of life for toddlers because they're not yet capable of managing or communicating their frustration in another way. But you can defuse many meltdowns by letting your child feel as if she has some control. Lay two outfits on the floor, for example, and make it her "job" to pick one. If your child still loses it, help her to calm down by taking a time-out from the situation, getting down on her level, and letting her know that you're listening to her and you understand why she's upset. --Jeannette Moninger

Copyright 2008. Used with permission from the February 2008 issue of Parents magazine. Updated 2009

The answers from our experts are for educational purposes only. Please always refer to your child's pediatrician and mental health expert for more in-depth advice.

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is it normal to a 14th montth old baby boy to have tantrums in this early age?what will i do to prevent this?
Submitted by camangonk_10
@ MommySage - with my 2 year old, when this happens I say "Ok, let's keep going and when you are ready to make a choice we can come back." Then I start to walk away. At home when it's a choice between Milk & Water and she want's juice, I usually pour a glass of one of her choices. Then I set it in a spot she can reach, and tell her, "ok, well it's right here when you are ready."
Submitted by Theresa298
Many factors can contribute to meltdowns. There is an excellent book by Tina Feigal that you can find through Amazon.com - It's a quick and easy read. Tina helped me so much when my boys were toddlers that I decided to get trained and become a parent coach myself.
Submitted by TheParentCoach
Age 2. What about when you give them a choice but they still throw a fit because it's not the choices they wanted. Ex: In the store, my daughter wants the $70 singing Mickey. That is not an option, so I removed her from the isle to another more affordable isle and let her have a coice of somethings in the $10 range, but that is not what she wants. So I decided because of her behavior that she was not geting anything at all, and that reaction of couse was insane! So now what?
Submitted by mommysage
How about when she does it in public and it is hard to walk away?
Submitted by sh1121
I calmly, but sternly say "No ma'am", then walk away. This shows my one year old that she gets zero attention from me when she acts that way. So far it's working. She quickly calms down, stands back up and walks over to me for a hug.
Submitted by emasters