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How do I tell a friend that I may not feel up to attending her wedding just a few weeks after I give birth?

I’m pregnant and a close friend is getting married a few weeks after my baby’s due date. She’s really counting on my being there. But even though it’s a local wedding, I don’t know if I’m going to feel up to going so soon after giving birth. How can I tell her that without offending her?

Submitted by Maryn.Liles

I’m assuming your pal doesn’t have kids. But it doesn’t take being a mom for her to know that it won’t be easy for you to make a firm commitment now, not when you don’t really know when your baby will make his or her big debut or whether you’ll be firmly planted in a glider postpartum, nursing around the clock. 

Then again, after a few weeks home with a newborn you might be dying to slip out of the house for a couple of hours to fête your friend. As long as the bride’s okay with it—and you can promise to give your response in time to meet her deadline for a final head count—keep things open: “I truly want to be there, but it just might not be possible depending on when my baby arrives.”  

The answers from our experts are for educational purposes only. Please always refer to your child's pediatrician and mental health expert for more in-depth advice.

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